End of the year already

I am amazed it is the end of the year. The time is flying by. Last night it was 2 years since my mom died. I was in a surreal place yesterday, but today it was heavy on my heart. I just cried and cried when I left work early today. Just amazed at how heavy grief can be on your heart and in you at times. I have faith to see her again, it just is hard to not see her now.

Life is so like it will never end most days--we just all go about it like it is going to go on forever...at least I do---and then....something happens to grab your full attention. I am tired, work has been very tense. The holidays are always hard on people---with deaths, sickness, joblessness, troubles, etc. It is so important to look for the miracle of Christmas in the midst of it--the thankfulness for the life we have...I have. I have not written for a long time---2 months, but I think about writing---funny. Seems to be hard to put words on paper--or even a blog.

I am getting ready for a new year-the gift of a new year---the honor to live through another new year's eve. I always wonder if I will be here to celebrate another one--so thanks be to God for this gift of living. I hope to live well this new year---and more and more purposely, intentionally, slowly....listening, walking-not running---taking time to reflect, enjoy, read some more...be simple...real. A peacegiver...forgiver...forgetter, kind. listen well. bring joy into the moment. Stop running so much...home more...ahhhh.....hope to be able to hold the pressures of the moments and the craziness away.
If you are reading this---hope so for you too.